The Bass Complex
If you're a guy and you play bass guitar, then you can frankly bugger off, cos more than likely you are furtively donning a massive bass complex - i.e. musical insecurities trying to be disguised through arrogance and egotism: both personally and musically...
He can never keep in tune “Your guitar needs tuning,” I might say to the lame-arse guitarist, not really aware if it was the bass, or indeed, the player himself.
“I have no concept of pitch,” he would reply, though not in so many words. I snort aloud at the thought of him so openly admitting to any of his weaknesses. Especially musical weakness, although he’s never even played a scale in his life.
His frustrated attempts to tune a guitar against his tone-deaf ear tells me what his words never will… The result of his tuning efforts only ever become more strained and raspy than before.
But it was his own fault really. He would always try to jam along with the likes of Angus Young, Trent Reznor, Syd Barrett. Blasphemous, really, for a bass palyer to assume himself in such a high regard…especially one of his calibre.
It happens to the youngest child. Those once hampered with an Oedipal complex and no idea of how to act upon it, they start to play the bass guitar.
How many bass guitarists could you name? In all seriousness, they’re the Kris Novoselic’s of the world. And if you haven’t heard of him, then my point is even further proven: i.e: he’s the only dude from Nirvana with no obvious acclaim (albeit, a lot of bucks..) But they want it so much more...
The bass players are always the ones who want the tiring rounds of publicity and in their live attempts to elbow their way to the spotlight centre, right in the thrust of the frontman, further attempt to ascertain their musical genius. And yet they can't even play a simple chord...
Ah, the bass complex. Yes boys, your penis's may be very large, but you still can’t play music for shit. Perhaps you should just whip out your dick onstage and blow the audience away in the more literal sense.
Sep 6, 2008
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8 comments:
Yes, you are indeed full of shit my good sir. Quit wanking on the internet and go get a life. I'm being as ignorant, as you are.
Are you kidding me? I'm a bass player, I started off on euphonium and played bass because i thought it sounded cool, no other reasons such as a lack of musical talent as you put it. In fact I'll not be modest here and tell you that in my music course my rank at the moment is 1/21. In that class are rock guitarists, vocalists, drummers, award winning jazz musicians, classically trained wind and string players, dedicated percussionists and of course the piano players and more. Listen to "Selene" by Michael Manring. Listen to "Rushed Love" by Gustava Del Farra, listen to "Power" by Marcus Miller. In fact, listen to music. I don't know what the fuck you've been listening to.
One word: Flea.
this made me laugh i play bass, piano, drums, organ, and also your so beloved guitar and i think bass is probably the best out of the lot never once have i seen someone judge me on playing the bass over any other instrument and not take my knowledge of music seriously because of it. I reckon the bass players right you must be out of tune and have no sense of music at all
I am a bassist. But Im also a drummer, guitarist, pianist, and accordion player. Yeah. Lack of musical talent. You sir, you are the load your mother should have swallowed!
What you really want to say is "I hate my bass player as a person" The bass guitar is just symbolic of your hatred for this particular person.
I'm loving your ignorance and the lack of research in this rant. Shoutout to every bassist. Without us the band lacks something.
The part with the scales. I'm just going to put this list of bassists here.
- Viktor Wooten
- Marcus Miller
- Stanley Clarke
- Pino Palladino
- Steve Bailey
- Jacques Bono
- Jaco Pastorius
Les Claypool
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