Why the sisterhood's a sham!

I've been much probed of late to reveal my thoughts about our new PM, Ms - that's right, MS, she might as well be Penny Wong - Julia Gillard, and how this how incident well invariably dictate the entire political outcome til the Armageddon (of which, Ms Gillard, is disinclined to believe in being a Satanic atheist type).

Honestly, I don't think that I am lending the correct response, judging by the vaguely crestfallen response I see when I shrug and offer up some wanky-non descript sort of response, such as "hmmm, time will tell"

Besides her being a ranga with a vocal range akin to a pubescent boy's, this is all pretty whack to be happening right before the election. And time now plays a major role in determining our political fate..

Because I once - not that long ago - was convinced the modern western world was becoming a free-lovin age of aquarius bunch a socialists without any of the rage of the Socialist Alliance part members.

Luckily I have been curbed of such delirium with threats of internet filters and massive oil spills, but politics turns time at the speed of light really. 

Was it really that long ago that we were under the Howard bloody government with no end in sight when a slightly dorky, effluent, Mandarin speaker took Labor, and in turn, the country, to better places?

And, no, I don't think his tears warranted jeers and calls of our shafted PM being a soft-cock...and in any case, don't you think he shall be suffering from this very symbolic castration performed by his ball-busting wife glad to have taken over the driver seat again...

And Jules is far too controversial to secure the vote...The theory of the reality TV contestant Voting Pattern may be applied:

 Women shall not induct fellow women into any state of superiority: Women shalt not win Big Brother unless intellectually delayed, which will attract an altruistic and condescending group of bill-paying followers..

The same happens in Australian politics...Women don't cut it, unless they're thick as shit... 

You're either "deliberately barren" such as the case with our Jules, or use your children as political trump card and eventual excuse to leave the Democrats - Natasha SD...

Or the malicious favourite being "That whore, Cheryl Kernot.." versus "That stud, Gareth Evans..."

As of yet the stakes are high - and the bets are on - to try and hazard a guess over the imminent date with the polling booths..I reckon the longer it's left, the crazier the shiznay will get...

Just ask Regina from Big Brother

Why hasn't our PM got something better to do?

Perhaps it's a ploy to scare Tony Abbott..


No wonder this blessed little cherub is going to extremes in demonstrating her political disdain towards KRudd: by picking her nose she is probably making her own solid attempt to scrummage up some Haitian aid whilst our PM is hot on the publicity trail alongside ex-play schoolie, Rhys Muldoon, co-author of literal nightmare, Jasper and Abby and the Great Australia Day Kerfuffle.

Having recently visited the humble chambers of Kevin Rudd during an exciting excursion with my Political Reporting class, I can now attribute the wealth of Harry Potter editions adorning his bookshelf (ironically, alongside, The Bible..hmmm...) as research for his own venture into the world of children's book authorship...

Not using the publishing world as an attempt to maintain financial independence form ball-busting wife Therese Rein, apparently proceeds from the book will go to Centre for Community Child Health.

The grammatical errors featured in title alone: "Jasper, Abby and the..." would be much more appropriate (what did commas ever do to you Ruddy..?), are enough to make me hurl

There is alsthat a niggling issue that continues to goad me: the Haitian crisis, over which Rudd seems to be sitting pretty..(much like Mark Latham post-Boxing Day tsunami getting caught poolside at a Terrigal resort instead of attending press conferences..)

Righto Krudd, you've proven that any idiot can write a book, especially when the target demographic may not even be able to read yet, do as the US have done (come on, you must be pretty used to that "monkey see, monkey do" mentality by now...) and join hands - and chequebooks - alongside Howard and Keating, and hey why not Hawko! in an effort to help Haiti, so you can find something else to add to that "What I Did Over Summer" Parliamentary report...

But it seems that, alas, the only leaf Kev wishes to draw from regarding US politics descends dangerously close to the recent Sarah Palin deal with Fox...with plans for Krudd to take on Kochie in the breakfast TV stakes...Glad to hear he's got nothin better to do....

Hopefully I shall further pursue the issue of Krudd and the kid lit tragedy on Tuesday Overdrive tomorrow from 4.30 with my old fav, Ben Pobjie, who is keen to return to the airwaves following his axing from Melbourne community station 3RRR...

Why I HAVE to Start a Right-Wing Hip-Hop Crew

So, I saw that crap-arse video clip on "Rage" in the wee hours of the morning, something along the lines of: "From Little Things, Big Things Grow"...Not only did it feature the revoltingly emphatic lefties such as Missy Higgins and my all time favourite "indie artist", John Butler...

Australian music lovers alike, this is seriously uncool...Now that K. Rudd (or, as I like to call him, Krudd) is in power, what are the likes of The Herd et.al going to rap about? The government's in a state of relative peace...I mean, sure, we're pissed about petrol prices and puny pensions, but generally, all is amazingly cruisy, governmentally speaking.

That's why I need to take over the hip hop world and do tracks such as, "Do you want Fries with your Whale Burger?" and "The Howard Lament" just to even up the balance and stuff...I mean, what, with Bush almost out, and the potential of a black president arising, what will rap stars have to complain about???